- Shopping. Now, you might be wondering what’s to hate about shopping? I’ll tell you what’s to hate about shopping (apart from finding out that the clothes you’ve got your eyes on, fall just short of your size). The salespeople. Especially the ones who follow you around. Watching you all the time to see if you steal anything from their priceless collection of pimple creams, cause, you know, we just can’t get enough of those!
The thing that irks me most, is that they don’t even offer you any help, they just silently hover in the background. They seem to be handpicked for jobs like this. They are well trained to ignore the scorching glances you throw their way and the “Thanks but I’m just looking around” hints you drop. They always have these dull and lifeless expressions on their faces that, even if you have come to steal something, sap the enthusiasm out of you to do so leaving you with a vague feeling of wanting to crawl back to bed and curl up under the sheets. Hmpf. Shopping. Just kill me now.
- I’ve taken to *cough cough* excercising recently to lose weight (It’s about time I did something). The downside is I’m now aching in places I didn’t even know I could feel pain in. This is what happens when you start working out after 22 years of not doing anything and hoping that everything will work out on it’s own. (Oh, the pain!)
- Don’t you just hate it when tv shows try real hard to be funny? The writers come up with all these witty (or so they think) lines that they are so sure will boost the TRP ratings. Sample this if you will –
Vampire : You do know that I’m 500 years old, don’t you?
Girl : (struggling and failing to flirt and be funny at the same time) I wouldn’t have pegged you a day over 450. (?)
Vampire : I use a great moisturizer. (?????)
I’m sorry, is that supposed to be witty? Is that supposed to make me laugh? All it does is make me wanna throw up. A lot.
- I had my photo taken for my driver’s license the other day. I climbed up seven flights of stairs, waited in line for half an hour to get my picture taken. Yesterday, I got a phone call saying that there had been a power cut and the RTO computer had crashed and my photo had been “erased” from the memory. Now, I have to climb seven flights of stairs all over again, wait in line for an excruciatingly long time all over again.
If one more person tells me to look on the bright side and that it’ll help in my weight loss, so help me God, I will hurt him.
- Me : “Hello?”
Person on the other side of the phone : “Hey! Guess who?”
“Go on. Guess”
(Sounding hurt) “What, you don’t recognise my voice?”
(Feeling guilty and embarrassed) “No, sorry…”
“Well, it’s me! Your mom’s uncle’s son’s cousin! I had come to your house when you were 12! Do you remember now?”
Er…What do you think?
- Oh, did I mention PMS?
P.S – Am I the only one who thinks that “Bendy Straws” are one of Man’s better ideas in recent times?